Sorry!

I kinda forgot to check to see if there were new posts
so I missed the last one you did on the 15th.

So I want to start by saying I love you so much too.
You are my angel and, in so many ways, my very best friend.
I ache every day from missing you so much.


Today was a really big fucked day!
I've had a total of five meeting cancelations this week – others were running late so my appointment ran out of time, conflicts with schedules or, in the case of Jeremiah Hennessy, just ignored my messages and blew off the meeting in general. Rude.
I also had a date that went south – or at least got canceled prematurely.
My bud Lynda got a case of menopausal depression within seconds after getting to my house.
One minute she is sweet and sexy and very feminine.
And then she turns into Satins foot soldier just out of Hell's boot-camp breathing fire and smelling like smoking tooth decay from a dull drill (Note the Dental metaphor) while she rubs ice furiously on her cute little wrists.
Next she starts sobbing, grabs her giant designer bag – knocking over a glass vase with just-bought Gladiolus in the process – and slams the front door like she wanted to demo the place.
It gave me pause to reflect.
I realized that if I keep dating women in the 45 – 55 year old range I am doomed to all manner of menopausal outrage for the remainder of my life.
I guess I need to find someone who is 40 and fertile or 60 and no longer a friend with her vagina. Jesus... who knows.
I wonder exactly when your mom became a victim to hormonal deprivation? All evidence points to 1997 but the precise moment is kind of up for grabs.
Oh well!!!
So I guess I'm feeling a little sorry for myself too.
I've got these new fucking teeth and nobody to bite!
This is what it must feel like to be a woman with new breast implants.
No wonder they run out and get extra tight wife beater tops and Victoria Secret magic bras.
They need to get that shit out there so that someone can take em home and worship the new temples.
"Why are you looking at my breasts?"
But what the fuck do you do with new front teeth? Smile? How creepy!
A 60 year old guy goes to a bar and starts smiling with complete abandon and before you know it everybody moves down a seat to get the fuck away from the grinning idiot! Terrific, right?
So this weekend I plan on laying low again.
Clean the garage.
Lay out at the pool.
Maybe practice my smile.


I can't believe you are going to be 29 in a few weeks!
Love you so much my little pumpkin.

XOXO Dad